Ivory soap

When I see commercials on TV today I think "Way Too Much Information". What do I care about panty shields, cooling bras or how to stay feminine fresh? Although I do admit that at my age, my ears perk up when I hear Cialis ads!

When I was a kid in the 50's and early 60's there was ipana or pepsodent toothpaste; poll parrot or buster brown shoes; shredded wheat, corn meal or wheaties! I couldn't choose boxers or briefs; my mom took care of that detail. I used aerosol underarm deodorant which would sometimes become sticky, any razor blade that I could find (yes I've been shaving since I was 14!). If there was no shaving cream available, I just soaped up what beard I had and shaved away! It was at this point that I discovered that pieces of moistened toilet paper would soak up the blood from cutting myself due to using dull razorblades. I made it to school several mornings with pieces still stuck to my face, but the strange looks or giggles soon alerted me that something was wrong. So upon checking my zipper, I soon figured out that the pieces of TP on my face was the object of everyone's bemusement!

There was, however, one personal care product that I would not compromise on; I had to use Ivory soap! No Dove, Camay or whatever feminine fru- fru soap for me, no sir; nothing but Ivory would do! I used it for a shampoo (which might explain the flaking that I noticed), shaving cream as I mentioned before, and of course soap for washing. It didn't lather particularly well, had no discernable smell, and it came in one color- white! It did have one quality which drew me to it; it was 99 and 44/100 % pure! This meant that I was putting nothing bad or toxic or otherwise harmful on my skin while bathing or showering. And while bathing it was always easy to find because it floated! I didn't have time to go feeling for soap at the bottom of my bathtub, I was too busy planning other activities. I don't know why to this day, but going on a date after using a 99 and 44/100 & pure soap made me feel, well it made me feel pure! And since I had not completely discovered girls yet, well that was darned important to me! It made me feel just as pure, or purer even, than the girls I was dating. I did however, look forward to the day that I would become a man and no longer feel the need to use Ivory soap anymore!